Corridors of my Imagination

Sat, 26 Dec 2009 04:39:08 GMT

The end is a new adventure, and how I have longed for this beginning.

A breath of fresh air

Wed, 23 Dec 2009 09:27:41 GMT

I apologize for all the angst.

On a more positive note, I saved all of my grades. In an amazing effort to cram all that I could, I finished all 7 art projects, crammed 200 or so Kanji, studied a ton, and actually put forth effort.

Still maintaining the overall grade average, no C's to date. Woot!

I am officially in a Theater Class. Well on the way. Taking two classes with the Tard. One class of art history yay! And two theater classes.

Still making plans to move out of here.

Tue, 22 Dec 2009 07:53:40 GMT

Why does everything fall apart...

Sun, 20 Dec 2009 23:17:03 GMT

i hate that woman.

She's fucking senile and paranoid.

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 23:07:48 GMT

See the world from a different perspective everyday.

Renew yourself.

Live.

Fri, 18 Dec 2009 08:06:46 GMT

This semester has been beaten down into hell.

Good riddance.

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 10:58:44 GMT

Here's to a new beginning *raises glass*

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 01:38:30 GMT

I wasn't in a particularly good mood today and I come home. I find out my hamster died. I don't know what happened. I even played with him for a bit last night and he seemed fine.

Mary made a list... I want one too!

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 03:58:57 GMT

I am breaching upon the age of 21 and what have I done for myself? Nothing noteworthy. Not yet. Why measure it by age and deprecate myself further? What matters is that one starts now. One who not only makes the decision to change, but also one who acts upon those decisions. One who feels the invigorating surge to dream, create, and achieve.

-make a stop/animation movie
-draw a comic
-continue ballet
-devour all I can about technical theater
-create beautiful, ghoulish make up designs
-continue taking ballet
-run...
-watch 10 movies I've never seen
-buy a journal to write in
-get a job at servite
-learn more kanji
-continue studying japanese, speak with friends who do (in japanese)
-learn the functions of my macbook named Astaroth
-Study skeletal structure
-study the famous literary critics (and actually retain that information)
-ALSO make a costume that I feel confident about
-reacquaint myself with The Piano
-ALSO museum trips
-study color design

I will think of more. But I need to clean my room!

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 07:43:56 GMT

Alright..

All that remains now are..

my 7 art projects.. haha. All of them due. MONDAY. Awesome.
I need to buy.. a bright yellow marker and sharp orange marker. copic markers.
Five of them are started, the other two.. still in deliberation.
one essay. FRIDAY
one final. THURSDAY

Home free. 7 weeks of break. Thank god.

Other than that, all the other plans seemed to have fallen through. But how is that different from any other day? Kanji went surprisingly well. At the last moment, I somehow remembered the majority of them. Studying has paid off!

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 04:25:42 GMT

Just kidding.

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 03:24:14 GMT

Potentially have a place for next semester!!

Yay. Finally.

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 23:28:50 GMT

There is no chronology. What is written here in sequence isn't written in order.

Nothing is and isn't.

The end is not the last, and the middle is not the body, does the beginning start the story?

Things to do before this Semester is DEAD

Tue, 01 Dec 2009 17:53:42 GMT

Art Projects. - DUE DEC. 14

Perspective - messenger angel
Shadows- cat and fish
Chapman picture
pattern - trapese/circus
Montage!
Collage?

World Lit. 1900-Present

Presentation on Orientalism - DUE DEC 3
Final Exam

Japanese

300 Kanji Cumulative test - DEC 9
Study Pack - DEC 9

Contemporary Fiction

Group Presentation
Essay Final Exam - DUE DEC 19

I hate group projects. DETEST.. ABHOR... SEETHE.. in knowing that my teacher is absolutely the laziest teacher I know... to assign not only an awesome group project, but a Final as a Take Home essay... Why can't we just write it in class??

Mon, 30 Nov 2009 01:36:15 GMT

So much to do. overwhelming.

Sun, 29 Nov 2009 10:03:19 GMT

will it be blood or tears you weep first?

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 23:09:27 GMT

The more I think about it, the angrier I get.
The angrier I get, the more I hate you.

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 10:17:06 GMT

In a lake of fire I will baptize you.. and brand your sins deep within your flesh. Lest you forget why you burn...

Burn here with me.

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 10:12:44 GMT

I love new moon... I can't get enough of it.

Everything about it..

Especially Victoria.

And Jacob.

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 07:37:35 GMT

why are werewolves so sexy?

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 23:31:35 GMT

I didn't bring a notebook, but at least I brought my laptop. Although the obnoxious sound of my space bar makes me nervous to use it in class.

I feel ravenous

And hideous.

I want to sleep

I want to have fun.

I want to be with you

And not.

Forever and never.

I am angry and I hunger.

I have a stomach for wrath.

And for pain.

Inflicting and receiving.

Accepting.

Beauty in eloquence.

Beauty in simplicity.

I am dead inside.

Not by choice.

Red pill.

Blue pill.

Small pill.

Large pill.

Take them all.

Down your throat.

Die again.

Fill my lungs.

Pump my body.

Feed me blood.

Feed me life.

I want to live.

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 07:25:14 GMT

I hate those who find ease in whatever they try new.

Those who naturally talented.

Those who do not have to work hard for what they have.

And those who lazily spend their days, wasting away in their parents luxury.

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 09:42:55 GMT

I don't want to talk to you, leave me alone.

Dream from Last night

Fri, 25 Sep 2009 18:19:35 GMT

In this dream, I am in the world of Xmen. Sometimes I am Rogue and sometimes I splinter off into my own mutant. I have had a dream before of myself running away from hunters, though i would never make it very far. They are government agents who only seek to capture and experiment on young mutants.

The dream begins with me/Rogue escaping from a transit group. I had saved all my power for one burst of energy to free myself. I hear the men shouting orders, I look back and see that the leader has a tranquilizer gun. I dodge three shots before I disappear into a wall of trees. (In my dreams before, I don't think I ever made it that far). I keep running, weaving through the dense forest until I come up to a fence. The fence is immensely tall, I realize I can't climb it. I hear their voices coming closer. Luckily I find a small opening at the bottom and climb through.

Where I have ended up is an obstacle course. It is like a children's play ground, brightly colored metal tubing, slides, and ladders. Only this one is extremely tall and places that you should be able to move freely are now covered in wire meshing, blocking any attempts to just jump across.

I am climbing frantically through the children's maze. There are small openings between the mesh wiring, but to open then, you must lift two layers of regular metal fencing and the thin wire mesh. And when you do, the space created is barely enough for you to heave your body through. I have to climb up, climb down, lift wire, and drag my body. I finally make it to the end.

A girl, who I assumed is the one who watches the maze, begins talking to me. "You have only finished part of the maze, ah, but look, they are advancing towards you."

I am sitting higher than the maze and I am able to see my hunters trying to navigate the forest, however, dense the forest, these men are moving quickly. They see my above the tree tops and motion for a shot. The girl speaks again.

"If they shoot, it will be the singular, most painful feeling you'll ever experience." I am shot twice in the back by the tranquilizer. It is in this moment where I splinter away from Rogue's body.

I do not have time to stop. I become myself and run. The men had reached the Children's Maze.

I slam into a white doorway and burst through, nearly tumbling down the stairway behind it. The next part of the maze is an industrial building, a maze of white doors, white hallways, and white stairs.
I climb stairs, the kick down doorways. I am become frantic in my movements, my decisions, and my actions. I can hear their voices coming closer. I am going too fast down a ladder, I see a flash of metal in the light, but don't stop to look. I reach a door with a small knob. I twist it and open the door.

The next room is square, white with one door. One door with no handles and only a key hole. As I realize the flash of metal was small enough to be a key, the door behind me closes and locks. I am trapped.

I am trapped and I can hear their voices moving closer, closer, and closer still. I am trapped and they will find me. I am trapped and the door behind me opens.

I force myself awake.

That was my first dream. The next one continues from this. I woke myself up enough to miss what happens, but since I was in such a deep sleep, my dream continues within the same dream universe.

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 18:48:42 GMT

I feel absolutely useless.